The Seven Year Scratch
Tapas Winner
A twenty-six foot statue of Marilyn Monroe's subway grate scene can be
observed by all in Chicago. The original scene was shot in New York. New
York should retaliate, so when I retire, I'm going to visit the mayor. I'll
propose that a life-size statue be built over every subway grate on the
Seventh Avenue Line from the Battery to 242nd Street, or at least along the
Manhattan stretch. The tracks are elevated in the Bronx. On my statue, the
skirts will be real cloth and will rise when the train goes by, just like in
the movie. The statues won't be bronze or fiberglass. They'll have the
look and feel of real flesh. Tourists will come from everywhere to
photograph themselves next to the lady while the underground zephyr elevates
her raiment. Other live women may emulate her for posterity. It won't be
Marilyn alone. Every race and nationality will sanctify the shrines, an
uplifting experience for all. The skirts will change with the seasons and
holidays. We may have to glue the panties on the statues. Vandals will try
to take them off. College boys will want to hang them in their dorm rooms.
This will spawn a spin-off industry. The novelty stores will sell
commemorative panties. I'll do the statues free and make money on
after-market products. I'll probably have to pay royalties to somebody,
maybe several somebodies. Garter belts would be a nice touch, but I can't
do that. One can't mess with an icon.
