"Buenas noches, Senor. You'll be out by morning." They are lying. They found me in El Presidente's palace with my hands on that statue which had, until recently, been in the museum. Now these gray prison walls, which are quite thick, will be my humble new home despite their assurances that when their ridiculous taco court reconvenes and I face their judge and pay their hefty fine (read "bribe") I'll go free. Who do they think they're kidding? I can tell when they're lying, I can tell that think I'll believe their jokes, and I can tell that they know I have no money for "fines." I don't even know why I came down to this God-forsaken jungle ridden banana republic. I used to tell myself it was to fleece some easy pesos. What a rude awakening when I, who learned first about dysentary, had had then learned there were neither emeralds strewn about, lost gold mines, nor any "easy pesos," when I was approached by this Senor Gomez whose name wasn't really Gomez. Thus I, even though better than these people by virtue of skin color a and language, was made a patsy, played for a sucker. And yesterday I was in court, not the sanitary Perry Mason variety, but the dirty enchilada type, with slimy bailiffs and corrupt judges, not knowing what to do since I had no money for bribes while I tried to figure out how to tell them in their gabble gabble, with proper solemnity observed, it's only a statue, and they looked at me down greasy noses, why did you try killing El Presidente, as if anyone would believe these bastards who became duly authorized of the court because they married someone's ugly sister, why did you try killing El Presidente, just like that, idiots, squeezing some fame or political advantage, when they leaned forward in the sticky tortilla morning saying, tell us, Senor, why you are here, under CIA orders, were it not that such a blatantly obvious and ridiculous ploy concerned myself, how I would have a good laugh. The whole thing is enough to drive a normal person like me absolutely insane. Now, when I think back on the whole idea of coming down here in the first place, it was so incredibly misinformed, so senseless, so a waste of time that I should be kicking myself;what's done is done. I really don't like this dirty country or its lazy people. When I initially arrived here I tried my scams, and the more I triied the more they acted supremely dumb, because I honestly believe they haven't a single brain shared amongst themselves, and so I should not worry for these are the most stupid, most dismal, and most inherently corrupt people on the earth. So when I go to court tomorrow, and talk them all into thinking they have made a grave mistake, they'll not only free me, they'll pay my passage away from here besides. "Buenas dias," they said, "cigarette or blindfold?"