Malignancy
Bara Swain
I focused on a small
patch of psoriasis above my daughter's left eyelid.
Katie squeezed her brows together. She removed her wire-rimmed
reading
glasses and stared at her notes. The green lines of Katie's steno
pad
matched my hospital gown. I tightened the sash on the one-size-fits-all
robe and recalled a pet turtle that had survived the short cycle of
our
Maytag washer four decades ago. When the verdant amphibian drowned
in her
own water bowl only weeks later, I'd pressed my five year old to my
bosom.
"Am I going to die like that?" the solemn girl had asked. "No, Katie,
no."
"Do you promise?" she had whispered. I'd kissed my trembling
first-born on
the top of her golden curls and lowered my voice. "Just never
drink water
with a piece of lettuce on your head, baby."
I reached for a pitcher of ice-water.
"l'll do that, Mom," said Katie. My middle-aged
child buried the green
spiral into her purse. Her strong nose, dotted with pin-sized
blackheads,
protruded from a small face framed in an overabundance of bottled yellow
hair. With a steady hand, Katie filled my glass to the rim.
I folded the
Travel Section of the New York Times in half and handed it to my daughter.
She tucked it under her wide buttocks and plunged her hand into her
pocket.
Without benefit of a mirror, Katie smeared her mouth with a tube of
Maybelline's Ruby Red. On second thought, she retrieved the Times
and
blotted her lips on the east bank of the Yellow Sea. I had an
overwhelming
urge to call my travel agent or order Mu Shoo Vegetables with brown
rice and
extra pancakes. A sharp pain in my stomach dismissed my whimsical
impulses
with a dose of reality. I gave myself permission to pass gas.
Katie averted
her eyes. She settled her gaze on the I.V. pole next to my bed.
"Why ...?" began Katie.
"Not now, sweetheart." I gritted my teeth.
My daughter's eyes widened. Her surprised
blue irises filled with tears.
"To receive blood, Katie. I'm anemic from
..."
"Oh, Mom!" cried my child. "I don't want to
live on this earth without
you! Isn't there anything I can do?"
"Shhh, Katie, shhh."I pressed the cool water
glass against my
daughter's temple. A dead flake on her eyelid floated through
the charged
air. Katie's ample bosom heaved. With my free hand, I slipped
my fingers
into her 104 Natural Golden Blonde tendrils. I massaged my daughter's
salt
and pepper roots. "Baby," I whispered, "just never drink water
with a piece
of lettuce on your head."
"But, Mom ..."
"Shhh."
I licked my daughter's tears until my thirst was quenched.
First published: August 2000
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